Last thoughts before I slip into unconciousness.....He has bit my face, how bad I do not know, his hands are around my throat, and hes squezzing out my last breath. In my arms....one of my twin babies - we fall back onto my bed, thankfully a soft landing for my son....."Please Heavenly Father take care of these babies-protect them until help arrives". As I finish the prayer in my head, he stops what he is doing, gets up leaves the room and procedes to fall into a deep sleep on the couch.
I sit up, hug my son to my chest and think to myself...."Is this how I am to live? Is this how my life will always be? Is this the life my twin babies will grow up in?" - then...clear as day Heavenly Father spoke to me. "Get your Diaper bag, pack it with what you would need for the day, get whatever papers are important to have (birth certificates), get your checkbook, get the babies, pretend you are just going to the store, walk out the front door and don't look back...prepare yourself mentally for never returning. And, so I did...
How did I get here in the 1st place? This was really hard. Not only am I walking away from my life....but the house and everything in it is mine. I bought it before "he" came into my life. I had to walk away from everything...everything plus 2 babies. }}}Big Heavy Sigh{{{
Sunday, February 28, 2010
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