WOW I'm 49 - I slipped and fell yesterday!

My Goodness - My Goodness - My Goodness!!!

Do I feel it more cuz I'm almost 50?

Or am I making it more of a big deal because I'm almost 50?

Would it hurt the same if I was almost 30?

Would it be just as hard to get up if I was almost 30?

All I know for sure is....It hurt, It was hard to get up, It was a big deal!

Thankfully....as I laid there crying and feeling sorry for myself....my 2 almost 16 year olds came and picked me up, brushed off my butt and kinda babied me (like I would have done them) asked me if I was ok?

I love um!  Those 2!

My Life

Last thoughts before I slip into unconciousness.....He has bit my face, how bad I do not know, his hands are around my throat, and hes squezzing out my last breath. In my arms....one of my twin babies - we fall back onto my bed, thankfully a soft landing for my son....."Please Heavenly Father take care of these babies-protect them until help arrives". As I finish the prayer in my head, he stops what he is doing, gets up leaves the room and procedes to fall into a deep sleep on the couch.

I sit up, hug my son to my chest and think to myself...."Is this how I am to live? Is this how my life will always be? Is this the life my twin babies will grow up in?" - then...clear as day Heavenly Father spoke to me. "Get your Diaper bag, pack it with what you would need for the day, get whatever papers are important to have (birth certificates), get your checkbook, get the babies, pretend you are just going to the store, walk out the front door and don't look back...prepare yourself mentally for never returning. And, so I did...

How did I get here in the 1st place? This was really hard. Not only am I walking away from my life....but the house and everything in it is mine. I bought it before "he" came into my life. I had to walk away from everything...everything plus 2 babies. }}}Big Heavy Sigh{{{

Turning 50

I think I've mentioned?  I'm turning 50.........

I'm getting those spots on my hands.  Those spots that I recall seeing on "Older" women.  Hmmmmm!

I Crack Myself Up!

My Brother and Sister In-Law own a up scale Hair Salon. 

And every year for Christmas they always give my sons hair products, like gel.

About a week ago I was getting ready for work and decided I needed a bit of hair gel for my own hair that morning.  Reaching for my own I discovered it was empty and that is because my boys take it upon themselves to help themselves to anything that belongs to me without asing - no matter! Remembering that they had gotten some new stuff from Aunt J for Christmas - I'd just use some of thiers.  I knew the tube was green and it said something about "Minty" - Heck, I didn't care I just needed a squirt and I didn't care if it was minty or fruity or whatever....

So.....I found it, gave my left hand palm a good quarter sized suirt, rubbed my hands together and started applying the gel to my hair, squishy it round and about, when all of a sudden I noticed the hair gel suddzing up.....hummm, I thought to myself, this is some wierd hair gel that is suddzing as I continued to squish some more into my hair......Thats when I decided to actually read the label........

"Mint Rush - Hair and Body Wash"

I'm not a morning person....my alarm is set for just enough time to get the boys up and out, then it's re-set for me...with just enough time to get ready and go.........theres no time for hair washing!!!! I only had enough time for hair gelling!!  Oh-Well! Anyway.........Long story short I actually made it to work on time.

My Sister In-Law after hearing about my "Gel" issues.

Gave me this.

It's Awesome!!!

Lavender, Citrus and Eucalyptus.  All of my favorite scents.

 It smells awesome!

IT'S A CELEBRATION!!!!

IT REALLY IS A CELEBRATION!

::It:: really has served ::it's:: purpose! 5 times to be exact!

::It:: was made ready for use some 50 years ago and was operational I'm guessing 30 years ago?

But now ::it's:: "Expired", moved into "Not Needed Anymore".

::It's:: done a very good job! Sometimes maybe too good!

I can remember being very annoyed that like clockwork ::it:: would be switched to "On"....but then....like clockwork ::it:: would turn off again. Like a "cycle" really.

The 1st time I used ::it:: I was very young, only 18yrs old.  ::It:: craddled, hugged and nourished ::it's:: contents, and with the sounds and rythyms of the environment a scource of comfort to the contents.  ::It:: did a most excellent job. I was amazed to watch ::it:: work, to do ::it's:: job, ::it's:: "Soul" purpose.

-=-Presenting 1st Born Son -=-

The 2nd time I used ::it:: I was 22 yrs old. A little older, a little wiser.  I would like to think a little "Smarter"?  As before, like the 1st time I am amazed. ::It:: knows exactly what to do. With little to no help from me.

-=- Presenting 2nd Born Son -=-

The 3rd & 4th time ::it:: was used I don't remember how old I was. Maybe because it's one of those experiences in your life that maybe you don't want to fully remember? The parts I do remember are painful. I remember ::it:: being angry, squeezing, on fire, pushing, pulling, silent screaming. For whatever reason ::it:: had to expel ::it's:: contents. Now looking back I know that again ::it:: was doing :it's:: job. ::It:: had it's reasons.

The 5th time I used ::it:: 12 years had gone by. I was now 34. I really don't think I was anymore smarter either. But boy was I in for a shock! At 1st the pregnancy started out just like the other times. But then early on I was measuring further along, and I was like - heck.cool! So I was sent for a ultrsound and as the tech was doing the lookin around she said to me "How many babies do you like to have at once?" And I was like...??? Wha????

-=- Presenting Sons 3 & 4 -=-

My Uterus has expired!
I'm quite happy about it.

WOW 2010 WOW

My Goodness....time just keeps marching on. A little too fast if you ask me. I can remember as a kid time used to take for.ev.er! Each Christmas was what seemed like years away. Now? Sometimes time for me is tracked in pay checks. X number of pay checks until someones birthday, Christmas, Easter, vacation.

And now? In 10 months I will be 50! WaaaaaaWhooooo!

The 1st weekend of 2010 I spent putting my house back in order after the holidays. Took down our Christmas Tree and other Christmas decorations.

And mostly just enjoyed being at my most favorite place ever....

HOME

The Year of Turning 50

I'm turning 50 this year.

And instead of waiting until my actual birthday.

I thought I'd blog about it the whole year, and celebrate the whole year.

Turning 50 is a milestone isn't it? It should be. It is for me anyway.